I hated working at Kerasotes Showplace 16 so much that I decided going in for one last day was unbearable. Especially since they gave me the most bullshit postion in the history of bullshit postions, "T-point." Which really means stand there in the middle of the hallway 50 feet from anybody relatively interesting for however long we tell you to(which in my case 4½ hours) and pretend you're doing something important.
I tried to be cool about it, tried to get someone to cover my shift, but nobody was stupid enough to take a T-point shift, and I don't at all blame them(except Samantha).
So after that failed, I considered just not showing up at all, which would definitely get me fired, but I thought, "Nah, I'm a nice guy, I'll call in."
That's when I found out that the minimum amount of time before your shift to call in is 2 hours. I woke up an hour before my 2:30 shift.(I have insomnia you judgemental person you.)
So I call in, say I'm not gonna make it, and they're like "Oh okay, your kinda short of two hours, try to find someone to cover it." Which wasn't hard enough considering it was a shift that NO ONE wants, plus I only have the phone numbers of maybe 4 or so people that I work with used to work with.
I call back, "Hey, I couldn't find anyone." ... "Alright, don't worry about it." DONE.
...Then my house phone rings. But I never answer the house phone cause it's never for me and repeatedly answering the phone for someone else makes me feel like a secretary, and I'm having enough trouble working one job, I don't need a second one. So anyways, they were forced to leave a message begging me to call them back. Alright, they weren't actually begging, but it makes me feel more powerful when I say it like that.
Okay fine, I call back.
Me - "Hello movie theatre manager person sir." Tom - "Hey, this is Tom. Did you tell Caitlin last night that you weren't coming in today and yesterday was your last day?" Me - "Haha, yes I did." Tom - "You're fired."
Well, he didn't fire me right away, there was a bit more talking included, but that pretty much sums it up. I never thought Caitlin would tell on me! But I guess it is her job. Can't really blame her. Good job Caitlin. Seriously.
SO, I got fired on my last day for attempting to quit a day early... and it was totally worth it. I guess the only downside is that if the entire planet other than Kerasotes Theatres burns down, I'll be unemployed. Then again, I'd be dealing with so many other things, I don't think I could hold down a steady job. So yeah, totally worth it.
So, I don't know if I ever told you guys this. But I've been protesting Pixar since they put out Cars. I refused to watch any of their movies, and tried to convince other people to protest too. I also sent them a few emails. Why was I protesting you ask? Because I wanted them to make a Toy Story 3. Luckily, they agreed to my terms...
I'm caucasian It's the reason Michael Jordan's hittin' 40 this evenin'
I'm exhausted, barely breathing I been sittin on the bench all season
No matter what they'll never pass it to me My range is as far as my arms can reach
I'm caucasian So caucasian So caucasian So caucasian I'm caucasian So caucasian So caucasian So caucasian I'm caucasian
Not a monster, not a balla I'm simply tall, yeah And thats a problem, that'll never ever be solved
And no matter what they'll never pass it to me My range is as far as my arms can reach
I'm caucasian So caucasian So caucasian So caucasian I'm caucasian So caucasian So caucasian So caucasian I'm caucasian
Im caucasian / White like salt packs If I ain't translucent / What you call that? I'm notorious / spin move laborious Lucky if I get minutes with the Warriors I like mayonnaise, I like sodium We prolly lost if you see me at the podium What about Dirk? He MVP'n He ain't caucasian, he a european Bird's Indian, Nash' Canadian Garbage time when you see me in the stadium They say oh god, why he foul so hard? Look at his skin tone, he getting outscored
I'm caucasian So caucasian So caucasian So caucasian I'm caucasian So caucasian So caucasian So caucasian I'm caucasian
This may be the best album to never be released. Google it, and download it. It's amazing. Now if you're a hardcore hip-hop head, or one of those people that likes "whatever's on the radio" you might want to download something else. Just saying.
Track list: 1. "Revenge" (featuring The Flaming Lips) – 4:52 2. "Just War" (featuring Gruff Rhys) – 3:44 3. "Jaykub" (featuring Jason Lytle) – 3:52 4. "Little Girl" (featuring Julian Casablancas) – 4:33 5. "Angel's Harp" (featuring Black Francis) – 2:57 6. "Pain" (featuring Iggy Pop) – 2:49 7. "Star Eyes (I Can't Catch It)" (featuring David Lynch) – 3:10 8. "Everytime I'm with You" (featuring Jason Lytle) – 3:09 9. "Insane Lullaby" (featuring James Mercer) – 3:12 10. "Daddy's Gone" (featuring Mark Linkous and Nina Persson) – 3:09 11. "The Man Who Played God" (featuring Suzanne Vega) – 3:09 12. "Grim Augury" (featuring Vic Chesnutt) – 2:32 13. "Dark Night of the Soul" (featuring David Lynch) – 4:38 super secret download link only for those of you cool enough to find it!
